Julian's Car History
As a small boy aged three my father would push me round our back garden on my little, red, push-along racing car using a broom. He’d push me round for what seemed like hours (in reality it was probably only a few minutes) and that memory stayed with me forever.
I always loved driving and just like most blokes, as I got older I pursued my dream of owning exotic and fast sports cars. I’ve owned (or had as company cars) over 35 cars in my life.
My first car was an Austin Allegro 1.1 which I managed to successfully wrap round a telegraph pole after two months. Somehow I walked away from that (even though the glove box was sitting over ther passenger seat - good old automative engineering safety) protesting vehemently that there was a problem with the road surface . . . nothing to do with my driving!!! Obviously! 😊
Following that invaluable lesson what did I buy next? Another Allegro, although this time I really pushed the boat out and bought a 1.3 Super capable of propelling me from 0-60 in around 17 seconds (about 14 seconds with the choke out for the first five minutes of engine warming up).
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I proudly took this with me when I went to Hull to study my degree. As a student having a car set me apart from every other student (mostly) and I was considered “special”, a term my kids still call me to this day. Well, I did have my Mega-Allegro “decorated” with the letters “GTE” on the boot which I had painted on myself. That, coupled with the cork dashboard, the two additional dials I had installed including a vacuum gauge (that were actually left disconnected because I couldn’t be bothered to wire them up but thought they looked cool) and the two headrests I had fitted (the old style that you simply bought from Halfords and fitted over the seat-back) all helped in the “cool department”. What really rounded it off nicely was the fitting of a wire-mesh, quick-through air filter which gave it that wonderful "suck-rasp" noise which, when first starting up with full choke made it sound legendary.
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Okay, perhaps in my own head at least. . . . but I loved it all the same. I never crashed this one.
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After owning this for a couple of years, I had a gap year working for Pilkington Glass in St. Helens. I decided to upgrade to something wholly in keeping with my new status as a man of means! First paid job ever, £6,400 pa. “I’ve arrived!” I thought to myself. Well, obviously that demanded something special so I progressed to a Vauxhall Cavalier 2000 saloon, a full 2-litre engine capable of doing 110mph.
Wow, what a machine. Rear-wheel drive too . . . mega! Learning how to slide a car, err I mean learning what happens when you put too much power down in a rear-wheel drive car without actually knowing how to control it; a skill I was able to call on in my first season racing . . . . not knowing how to control a rear-wheel drive car when it slides. Doh!
When I started work I sold this as I was given my first company car, a real “pocket rocket”, a Vauxhall Nova GTE (1.6 fuel injected small hatch back – utterly brilliant, apart from the fact it had a steering wheel the size of a small bus!) – the only brand new car I’ve ever had.
My friend Dean and I had immense fun driving around in our cars, me in my Nova and he in his Peugeot 205 1.9 GTi, one of the best pocket rockets ever produced in my opinion; what a gearbox, what an engine, what a sound. Unfortunately this period of ownership ended abruptly when I bounced my Nova off both sides of a flyover above the A3 near Wimbledon. Again, it was clearly the road surface that caused the problem, not at all my driving.
Being the very humble . . . . err, young upstart with a company car that I was, my company also had a carphone installed for me, Cellnet as was (a classic NEC car kit with built-in hands-free speaker and separate passenger handset. I had truly arrived!!! Well, what do you wear when you’ve got your first car phone in yor first company car in your first proper, full-time job? You go out and buy suits with braces like a proper “80’s” yuppie”. The only problem was I didn’t really have the money to go with it, although we did somehow find a way to spend a few hundred pounds on pizzas every month between Dean and I!!
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Over my first several years of working I enjoyed a variety of machines after my Nova including an Opel Manta GTE (that most glorious of Group B rally cars), Vauxhall Astra SRi (I never had the GTE, always played second fiddle to my mate Steve who had one). Then a fabulous Peugeot 405GTi which was the last half decent car I had for a while (although Dean and I did get to run about in my girlfriends Escort RS Turbo for several weeks. Very valuable lesson we were both given…….
One Friday night we decided we'd take a spin down to Brighton for a night out, just cruising around. On our way out of town heading home wwith Dean driving, we were slowly making our way back through what was a completely deserted town centre late in the evening. Not a sole around but the odd car. As we pulled up to a set of lights I looked behind us and there was a Ford Cortina Estate that had driven up behind us. The lights changed. We moved off. Normal pace. Dean commented that “the tw*t” in the car behind was sitting right on our arse.
Dean put his foot down and we left him for dust. Obviously. We’re driving an Escort RS Turbo and this guy was in an old Cortina Estate.
I turned to gloat only to discover he was still sat on our arse!! What the…..???
“Dean” I said, “give it some welly and leave this guy”. He duly obliged, the turbo spun up and we revelled in that lovely old-fashioned turbo sound and then “Bamm”, that bolt in our backs as the power kicked in and then that torque as the brilliant Escort squirted away from the “Norbert” in the Cortina behind.
I turned around to finally see the guy disappearing in the distance….. err (record scratching noise as I did a double take) ... What the absolute f***?
There he was, sitting so far up our arse when we’d given it the full beans and had absolutely nothing left.
“Pull over, get out the way” I said to Dean. We moved to the left and slowed down only to see this “Cortina 1.6L Estate” thunder past us with a guttural sound and a ferocity that we couldn’t believe. There it went, bouncing all over the road with what was clearly still the same, wallowy suspension but this almighty, single large bore exhaust. I can only assume it must have had a tuned old, Capri 3-litre lump in there, and I mean properly tuned.
To this day I’ve never raced Cortinas again!
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After losing my job (how dare they sack me, me? A graduate and man of the world with all the experience needed to run the largest corporate empire with a whopping 14 months experience (what did they know?!), I ended up with a few very, average cars. These included a Peugeot 309XS, Ford Orion Ghia 1.6i, Renault 21 hatch back, Rover 216GSi, Ford Mondeo 1.6 and a Vauxhall Cavalier 2000 CDi amongst many others.
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I then joined a company which, after three months allowed me a company car – my first BMW, an E36 318iS.
What a brilliant machine – never having had a BMW and always thinking they appeared slow from the stats I read in various car mags, I assumed it would be quite dull. Well, that was my first taste of and falling in love with BMWs. They really are the Ultimate Driving Machine.
I had my Bimmer but from an early age I had harboured a love for TVR’s. Sitting in the back seat of my parent’s car aged maybe eight, on the way from seeing my grandparents in Blackpool, I saw a TVR Tasmin 280i in a pub car park. Wow! Loved it, though it looked like a space ship and instantly decided one day I’d own one.
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Here I am in my late 20’s driving a company BMW 318iS and with enough money to afford to buy an old “Wedgy”, a Tasmin 350i in dark blue. What a sound, what performance. Well, everything’s relative . . . at the time it felt quick; 3.5 litre old Rover lump, awesome sound, twin exhausts and loads of low down V8 torque.
A 0-60 of around 6 seconds was for me utterly mega. The hood down was glorious; simple, manual, take the mid-section of the roof off and stick in the boot . . easy.
Balance of the car was utterly crap – thumping great 3.5 V8 over the front wheels, no weight at the rear and constant over-steer. Obviously, again nothing to do with my driving ability. Brilliant fun and my first taste of “supercar” ownership.
One day I ended up alongside a beautiful Sierra Cosworth, an original in Moonstone Blue, stunning, but hey . . . I had a TVR 350i. No way this guy could beat me. By the time we rolled up the next set of lights I’d decided I needed a quicker car. I promptly turned off into a side road, put the roof back on and sheepishly drove home with my tail between my legs. I needed power, and lots of it!
Still I did have my BMW 318iS company car. This was, albeit pedestrian by comparison to my TVR, still one of the most smooth 4-cylinder engines I’ve ever owned. 0-60 in around 9 seconds but 20-?? . . well, pretty good. Mid-range, once you got it spun up was terrific and, it was a BMW, that I had . . . me, little old me!
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Unfortunately a house move forced me to get rid of the TVR and the mileage on the BMW had reached that point where the company forced me to change it. So obviously, with the need for more power, wind in my hair, glorious sound what did I decide to opt for?
. . . . . A Mercedes E200 Elegance in dark blue!
A big old bus, steered with a tiller rather than a steering wheel . . . but as a company car what a status symbol. Driving around in a whopping great Merc. Should have had spinners and violet light strip along the underneath.
However, I absolutely loved it. Not fast but, well fast enough (I told myself that . . . in truth I couldn’t even outrun a scooter but hey, it looked good on me as a young, IT geek). It was cavernous inside and simply guzzled up tarmac on long motorway journeys.
After a year of having this as my company car, I was offered the chance to take a car allowance so I decided to take my money and buy something cheap but quick. I found an old Audi 100; can’t even recall what engine (2.8 I think), what age, what mileage . . . I just knew it was a complete lemon.
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Two months of ownership saw the gearbox fail catastrophically so, after two weeks in the garage being repaired I had it returned with oil, grease, metal filings and all kinds of crap in the footwell. Had to get shot - I decided to buy what I’d fancied for a long time . . . my first M3.
Beautiful E36 M3 convertible, proper manual, in blue. What a machine!!! Always knew one day I’d have another one.
A year of ownership and several thousand miles later saw me going through a divorce. Clearly such a situation left me needing cash so the M3 had to go, but not before having immense fun and realising how mega M3s are.
Welcome Saab 9000CSE low pressure turbo. Black. Classy. Understated. Not mega powerful but sufficiently quick to be a half decent motor. Bought from a dealer, relatively low mileage from memory and in absolutely immaculate condition.
Three months and several days later the timing chain decided to give up the ghost. Obviously just after the warranty had expired. As every single one of us has experienced – the car always lasts just as long as the warranty is in place. The second you don’t renew, something goes wrong. In this case, timing chain . . . err, new engine!
Managed to find a reconditioned one, had it fitted and carried on. That itch though . . still there. Had a TVR. Had an M3. Needed another TVR.
I’d been reading various mags and it might have been PerformanceCAR, can’t recall but there was an article comparing the newly released TVR Tuscan 4.0 to the then new Porsche 911 (996). Although the 996 was marginally quicker, marginally (a lot) more refined and easier to drive the resounding verdict was that the TVR was an absolute must for any car enthusiast. It was drop-dead stunning and aggressive-looking. I had to have one.
It’s now 2002 and I bought a 2000 4.0, one owner and already with the mechanical issues sorted and the roof latch levers, that were located in the boot which were pulled downwards to release the mid section of the roof, converted to open the right way (early versions had issues with the levers vibrating down / open so after 30 minutes of driving the roof pop off while hacking along! Not an ideal design!).
Mine was sorted. I made a quick change by having the baffles removed and wow!!! A car that was capable of 180mph (I had the 4.0, not the 3.6) and 0-60 in about 4 seconds - out of this world.
We all know the reputation of TVR’s with regard to reliability. My previous 350i was fine; never any issues other than a not-entirely water-tight roof but to be honest, I never took it out in the rain (intentionally) so normally not an issue. However, my Tuscan . . . one weekend I’d parked it back on my drive on a Sunday night only to discover that the driver’s window wouldn’t close. There's a microswitch in the door that tells the car the door is closed and allows the window to go all the way up. If the switch doesn’t detect the door’s closed, it prevents the window from closing. If the window doesn’t close the instrument cluster doesn’t work and presents you with a message that says “door open”. Useful. Thanks TVR!
I had to lock the car and cover up the gap (about half window) with a black, plastic bag and tape it to the car bodywork. Wasn’t sure I’d still have paint on when I ripped it off but better that than leave it exposed all night.
Monday morning I called the TVR garage in Chessington (Mole Valley TVR as they once were) – bearing in mind I was living in Slough at this point). They advised me to bring the car down that morning and they’d take a look immediately.
“No issue” I thought. I’ll let work know I’ll be late in (like a few hours late). As I got dressed it started to snow . . . (no, I’m not making this stuff up). “Brilliant. It’s snowing and I’ve got to drive with the window half open.”
I set off only to discover about a mile down the road that the engine was badly mis-firing and there was no way on earth I’d make it the 40+ miles or so to Chessington. I knew that running the engine could have damaged it so I pulled into the Copthorne hotel and stopped the car. After calling the AA and being told the wait was around four hours, I did the same with the RAC who also told me four hours. Ah. Sitting there, no window, it’s snowing and no way of keeping warm as I couldn’t run the engine. I had to sit with my arm held up to the window for a good hour until it stopped snowing. Finally got collected, taken home and car transported off to Chessington.
The fault? A simple, cheap, plastic microswitch that wasn’t working in the door but the engine had water in the spark plug area as it hadn’t been screwed in properly, hence mis-firing. It had to be emptied, cleaned, sorted. Thankfully no damage, just a damned nuisance.
TVR ownership . . . brilliant!
However, for a plastic car, made in Blackpool on a shoestring budget and electrical wiring still put together on a wiring loom in an old workshop, this thing was immense. I was surprised to learn that the brakes worked well too . . . .
Le Mans 2002, headed down with three of us in convoy – a Jag XJ8, 740i BMW and me in my Tuscan. The “good old days” when there was a convoy of big Brit bruisers on a pilgrimage to one of the most mega race circuits in history, captured forever in the eponymous film starring Steve McQeen in 1971.
The journey home although not quite as exciting as the weekend was over was, nonetheless an opportunity to stretch its legs and enjoy the hospitality that is the tarmac on some of Frances beautiful country roads; wide open, devoid of pretty much all traffic and idyllic countryside and iconic tree-lined open roads.
Making our way (a friend of mine in the passenger seat) back towards Calais we approached the brow of a hill. As we hurtled over the top at (ahem . . . some miles per hour) we were faced with the prospect of certain death as the queue of traffic stopped at the traffic lights (roadworks) directly ahead was, what appeared to be only a few hundred yards away. An almighty stamp on the brake and sudden panicked cadence braking (no driver aids in this thing) to stop us snaking and ending up sideways in a field, resulted in us stopping easily in time and in a straight line.
“Oh my god” I thought! “What a machine!”. I couldn’t believe this thing handled so well, was perfectly balanced and sorted. 360bhp, 350 ftlbs of torquey-thingy-me-bobs, a mere 1100 kg – only 4-pot callipers and no ABS, but boy did this thing stop.
After a long journey I arrived home (after dropping said friend home, around 9pm and as I pulled up onto our drive my wife (fiancée at the time) was sitting outside under the patio heater, relaxing waiting for me. I parked, locked the car and walked over whereupon she poured me a glass of cold “fizz”. “How lovely” I remarked. What a nice welcome home.
She sat me down and handed me a little gift. Something I assumed she had bought in Italy (she’d been away with friends and family for a week). A small box that looked like a pen holder.
As I opened it and saw the small pregnancy testing pen with the clear indication that our lives were about to change, I peered over my shoulder and blew a small kiss goodbye to my beloved Tuscan. Hey ho. Easy come, easy go!
If I was going to have to get rid of my Tuscan, then the Saab had to go too and in their place, I decided I needed something I could enjoy, that fulfilled the need to have fun, enjoy some power and yet be safe enough to carry around my family.
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In came my first 7-Series, a lovely 740i, 0-60 in around 7 seconds and for a big old bus it was super to drive. An armchair when stuck in traffic, a sports car when on the open road (okay, not quite a sports car, but fun to drive nonetheless). This one luckily had Alpina suspension so was properly sorted!
After putting 60,000 miles on it and the cost's just starting to creep up, I decided I should upgrade and treat myself to a newer machine, still keeping in line with the "large family car" idea. Stupidly I thought it would be a good idea to buy an 11-month old Audi A8 3.0 TDi Quattro.
Super car, absolutely loved it but really, I mean really, why on earth did I spend all that money?
Don't get me wrong, it was, and they are absolutely beautiful cars and the quattro is fantastic as a road car; comfortable, economical and spacious. The problem is when you take on a new job and your earnings go down the toilet for a year, and you think it's prudent to get rid of an expensive car in favour of a cheaper one, you end up losing so much money it's untrue.
Still, time to move on.
Having decided to save money, and yet still wanting a big car with at least some ability to overtake, I went completely the wrong way and, having experienced a Merc E-Class before though "yep, that works, but how about one with seven seats?"
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E320 CDI, big, spacious, quick-ish . . . just the ticket!
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A friend of mine then asked me why I'd done that. "Surely you want to enjoy what you're driving if you spend so much time in the car, don't you?" . . .
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I persevered . . well, for a few months until I got completely bored. It was really the fact I had to get the tiller out to steer it any time I went for a drive, and was always worried we might get stuck at a lock. It was after all just a bloody great barge!
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Mmmm. Not my best decision. Don't get me wrong, lovely car, drove well, the kids loved it as they could face backwards when sitting in the boot but too noisy, too dull, not me!
So having made the very sensible decision to sell the Merc, having already lost money on the Audi, I did exactly the same thing with this . . lost money!
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That's the problem with cars. Virtually no logic or rational thoughts goes into buying cars; it's all about how you feel / what makes you feel good. The more you make decisions based on feelings, the more poor you become!
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Okay, so time to be sensible.
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Something sporty. Something cheap. something I haven't had before. I know . . An X-Type Jag 3-Litre Sport.
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That Jaguar J-Gate is utterly crap. The X-Type is such a mind-numbingly rubbish car unless you've no interest in driving and simply see cars as a means to an end.
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I seem to recall picking it up for around £4k and sold it four weeks later for £4k. At last a sensible business decision . . four weeks free motoring, except of course for a reputation that was no in tatters. How could I claw my way back from the abyss? My friends would barely look me in the eyes . . "you bought a what????? An X-Type? What planet are you on?"
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Can't say I disagreed with any of them. Okay I'm now car-less.
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That's okay mum said to me . . "you can have the Saab back that you gave me". The air con smells like curry, the kick-down is broken, one of the windows doesn't work, there's virtually no power and the suspension doesn't feel quite like there is any elastic left in the springs, but that's okay, it's all yours again".
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So I had my old faithful back . . no wait, this is the one which blew an engine when the timing chain went. "old faithful . ." errr, maybe not. Hey ho, it's a car and I didn't pay for it.
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After a few months I needed something fun again. BMW! It had to be BMW . . .
Now I'm 6 feet 3 inches so obviously something big is what I needed.
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After scouring Autotrader I happened across a Z3 3.0 Sport. Test drove it, excellent fun, bloody quick and in brilliant condition in need of a new home. Happy days.
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0-60 in 6 seconds so although not blisteringly quick, good fun and rear-wheel drive, convertible and clean. I had my weekend car.
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I think around week four, the Saab ended up in for repairs (no surprise there) and I needed the Z3 for a work trip and drove it over 300 miles in a day. By the time I got home I could barely walk. Short trips, maybe to the shops and back great. Anything more than the nearest town, forget it!
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Time to sell the Z3. Only four weeks of ownership . . it sold two weeks later. I paid £6k, sold it for £8k. Things are looking up now . . two sensible business decisions in one year. But what next?
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With the Z3 sold and the Saab on its last legs, I needed something that again would fulfil my need for speed as well as being able to fit four adults in.
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This time however I wasn't really concerned about the four adults, only needed something I could fit two small children in the back of without needing child seats.
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Enter M3 number 2, an E46 that I'd coveted for some years. I knew they were mega but only from reports, word of mouth etc.
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After owning it for just over a year, my life changed . . . for ever!!! And it wasn't the car that did it.
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In January 2011 I was due into hospital for what was supposed to be a minor operation on my back, a disctecomy - see my bio page.
Life changed in a moment.
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One of my life-long best friends, Ray came to see me in hospital and said the most profound thing to me. Doing the usual "why me?" he responded with "why not you?".
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A bit of a bitter pill to swallow but what honesty. He made up for it by buying me a RC Tiger tank which shoots BB pellets. Mega!
After I got my licence back (see Bio) through the RDAC test, I found the M3 was simply uncomfortable to drive - awkward position for my left foot braking. I decided to sell it and take over my wife's Honda CRV and we bought her a Volvo XC90.
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This Honda . . OMG, what am amazing vehicle.
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Back around 2010 I think, she wanted to go off-roading. We went to the Abingdon 4x4 Festival and took the kids. Obviously not the difficult course but nonetheless a challenging course for some 4x4s, including some Jeeps. Helena driving and kids in the back, we virtually completed the course but for a mound which got us stuck on the exhaust.
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Considering it was 2WD normally and only called on 4WD when it needed, and given we were on road tyres, this thing was unbelievable.
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We ended up keeping the CRV right trough until it had clocked up around 175,000 miles. Eventually it just started to get a little tired and we sold it while it was still running.
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Whilst owning the Honda however, I found that it wasn't very comfortable for me on long drivers - too upright with my spinal injury. I needed something low down. I needed a comfortable car. I like big cars. I also love BMWs so naturally it had to be another 7-Series.
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I knew what I wanted, searched several online and saw three. Made my decision and bought the one I'd seen last there and then. A navy 735i, two owners, low mileage, immaculate.
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I put around 45k miles on it and it was as tight and sorted when I sold it as it was when I bought it. For a big old bus, it handled better than most small-medium family cars.
December 2013 . . I'd been browsing Autotrader, Piston Heads, various main dealer websites for a few months, constantly imagining "what if, could I afford it, would Helena divorce me . . blah blah bla?".
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I knew what I wanted . . from the first moment I'd laid eyes on them when Gaydon introduced it in 2004, I knew I had to have one.
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Helena and I were sitting in a small team room in Hastings enjoying a slice of cake, a cup of tea and reading. "What are you looking at?" she asked, "you're not still going on about them are you? Let's have a look?" she said.
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I handed the phone over whereupon she smiled and remarked "Mmm, that's quite nice. Can we afford it?"
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"Err, yes" I said sheepishly. "Go on then!" . . . WHAT??? She said yes.
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Three days later it arrived at our house for me to test it and deal done. I was now the proud owner of an Aston Martin DB9 Volante.
It's beautiful. Not the fastest car in the world but it doesn't need to be. I decided to have it fitted with a new exhaust - a Larini stainless steel back box and stage 2 sports cats. That, coupled with a minor tuning by GAD Tuning transformed it. Smoothed out torque curve, pulls more evenly from lower revs, in harmony with an absolutely glorious V12 symphony with no valves to reduce noise at low revs, I suspect some of my neighbours now want me to move away! :-)
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I've had issues with the roof . . annoyingly it's been back to the Aston dealer several times and is finally fixed but, mechanically, engine-wise, gear box etc. all absolutely rock-solid. It hasn't missed a beat in almost six years!
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If anyone ever suggests owning an Aston Martin is fraught with problems, I can tell you that is utter cobblers. I would have no hesitation driving it all round Europe.
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To this day it still feels like a real sense of occasion every time I get into it. Sadly however I hardly ever drive it now. When I've got weekends to have fun, I racing. I will never have the sense of thrill from it that I get from racing but it's still wonderful.
March 2019 - the 735i has finally reached the point where I need something a little newer.
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I reluctantly sold it (the guy who bought it will have a lovely machine for very little money). I decided to go back to an Audi A8. Another 3.0 TDi.
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Why? Because I liked the last one and it was very comfortable. Sadly, your perception changes with experience and I'm now very disappointed that I didn't stick with BMW. I'll probably run this for a while and then seek out another 7-Series. Until then . . . . .
February 2020 - After having decided to try an A8 again, I came to realise very quickly that compared to the 7-Series, it simply doesn't come close. Both 7-Series I've owned have been mega. Big executive cars that drive like small nimble saloons. Don't know why I even considered an alternative.
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Decision made - back to a 7-Series. This time the 730D. Class . . . pure class!
